Wednesday, 10 August 2011

Wasteland Lover 6: Klugemeister Harmonies

The group in early December 2281. I can't help but feel that Kluge is experiencing social decline.

High on life (also drugs), Felix Kluge swings by the Fort to go visit Caesar and report that he's offed House for the big man, expecting lavish praise and reward. But he's fucking furious with me because I killed the Omertas. I ruined his big plan or whatever. Hey pal, I'm sorry, but don't get fucking angry with me if you don't tell me your fucking plans. I am literally your most important guy in the Mojave and you have told me to go kill everything in the building directly across the street from where the Omertas live, and you don't think to fucking mention this shit? He says he'll forgive me this once, and gives me the opportunity to just this once admit to any other crimes against his Legion or other fuckups of his plans. He asks me if I've done anything he should know about. How should I fucking know? Guy doesn't tell me shit. Felix is close to losing his shit and Caesar changes tack (he totes noticed) and tells Kluge what a great guy he is for killing House or whatever, and then gives him another mission, to go meet the Boomers and either get them on my side or kill them all.

Caesar's kind of a dick though so Felix just goes to Primm instead to pick up ED-E, since I accidentally opened the wrong locker in my Wolfhorn Ranch base and realised I'd had the stuff to repair him stashed in its own locker since fucking January or whatever. So Felix fixes ED-E and goes to Nellis AFB with him and Lily in tow.

Now I don't know how I feel about the Boomers really, I guess. Or like, there's not a lot to say. They're one of a couple if things in this game that when you read/hear a one-line description of you're like 'man, what is this, Fallout 3???' The Kings are another one, but they pretty much pull that off and the Kings are great. The Boomers aren't bad. I like how they dress and I like that their base is realistically huge and contains shit like that biofuel refinery in the picture with Felix. There's no reason for it to exist beyond a little verisimilitude. But I like that. So much I didn't even steal all the maize (but only because it's not an ingredient in any of Felix's favourite dishes). But there's just nothing really going on. You'd never want to hang out there by choice. I guess it's just very homogenous (they're all Boomers) and none of the characters there are interesting at all. Plus the fact that it's basically just this one big mission you have to complete for all 4 of the endings in basically the same way, it's just some lame plot thing you just autopilot through after doing once. You do at least get your pick of the missions though, and Felix duly picks the lazy good-for-nothing ones (watch the kid tell his shit story, give that surfer guy scrap metal) because fuck killing a bunch of ants by myself or whatever. I do decide to fix the solar panels though, so I have to head way south to Helios One for those.

Helios One, on the other hand, I think is great. It's pretty similar to the Repconn site, in that you find them both at around the same time, and they're the first two of, and kind of the biggest, sidequests. All very self-contained and more-or-less unrelated to everything else, and once you're done with it you never really go there again. It just has a great feel to it I guess. I ran out of opinions a bit earlier than I thought I would here.

So yeah anyway Felix blags his way through the NCR guard outside and heads into the facility. Inside there's a moron and a very stern guy called Ignacio Riveras who Kluge effortlessly relaxes with some gay charm.


He fills Felix in on the situation, which is basically a 4 way choice between doing what the NCR wants (giving their bases power), doing what the Followers of the Apocalypse want (giving everyone power), taking all the energy for yourself to power a superweapon, and this weird option that makes no sense, giving power exclusively to Westside and 'Fremont', a location that doesn't even exist. I have no idea why that last one is in the game. I thought a while about how Felix would play this one. Obviously he wouldn't help out the NCR, and the super weapon isn't really his style. The last option makes no sense, so I guess we're just doling out power to everyone. I don't see a problem with that, Felix is more or less fine with everyone being their own people or whatever. I chicken out of also using the station to electrocute all the NCR soldiers outside. Mostly because all the NCR would hate me, and I can't really deal with this (stopping in on one of those little shacks around the wasteland, I was attacked by three giant rats and died).

That said, when Felix gets down there, they're all asleep on these weird outdoor beds they have, in the middle of the day. Whatever, I guess. I figure I'll steal this guy's dogtags to sell to the Legion, but when I set up to do it, a little menu pops up and asks me if I want to pick his pocket or murder him. I had totally forgotten I picked that Mr Sandman perk and have never used it. I feel a bit guilty for not lasering everyone outside, and Felix still feels like he has something to prove, so I go for it. It would be really brutal and unpleasant, only when you do it, this little percussive refrain plays. The best way I can think to describe it is the sort of sound effect that would play in the Sims if you made your sim do a magic trick. It's just like, so moronically light-hearted. I just love it.
I'm pretty much hooked right away, and gleefully dispatch all the other guards in the area the same way. I can totally see this becoming my modus operandi. That little jingle, man.
So yeah I got that nice scene where all the sunlight is reflected right in to your face and you are blinded by blissed-out wasteland progress, and I go tell Ignacio Rivas what I've done and he's pretty pumped for me. All that shit he was explaining about Helios One before also triggered that ED-E dialog, and in a little minute the Brotherhood of Steel guy Lorenzo comes and asks Kluge to hook up with a Brotherhood patrol and give them ED-E at the Repconn HQ. We figure okay because Felix hasn't been there before. It's all mad nerdy shit that Kluge has no interest in, geeky computers and displays of the universe and shit.

Felix has no extra-terrestrial ambitions

There's a couple of things to steal but not a whole lot of interest, and when Kluge finds the Brotherhood patrol they're fucking dead or whatever, like a roof fell on one of them and the other one just died of sadness or some shit. I get a password to their little base off the corpses, and Felix is on his way there when the Followers call him and say to take ED-E to them instead. Fine by Kluge - I don't even know these Brotherhood assholes and it would probably be a little awkward what with Felix being entirely responsible for Veronica's death. Also he's still pretty cut up over that shit. So at the Mormon Fort we hand over ED-E and Felix talks to ever-lovely Julie Farkas, who just loves him so much at this stage that she asks him to join the Followers (after a couple of questions, Felix accepts. Why not, I guess.) and gives him the key to their little safehouse. Which isn't bad, although basically all the free shit on the beds is stuff Felix can't or wont ever use. Has some nice chairs for Felix to hang out on though.
He's starting to look pretty old. Maybe it's just the hat and glasses combo or the way he's sat. Felix is a pretty vain guy though. First Veronica, and now his looks? Plus Caesar was kind of a dick earlier. All his gains are accompanied by equal or greater losses. What is the point of being the king of the Mojave if you are ugly?

Anyway, pushing those thoughts out of his mind, Felix hightails back to the Nellis AFB, fixes the solar panels, reports back to Pearl (the leader of the Boomers) who is pretty happy, then he gets told to raise a bomber plane from the bottom of a lack using 'deployable ballast,' the physics of which I don't understand at all. How does it work? It's a long-ass walk to the lake too, made much longer by the fact Felix sneaks for more or less the entire way, since there are fucking deathclaws right by the roadside and my compass thing has little red marks on it the whole time and I'm too scared to even go three metres off the road to grab some prickly pear.

There are cazadores inbetween Felix and the lake, so we have to fight them. They're only young ones so Felix and Lily manage to fend them off, although Kluge picks up another addiction (Buffout) to add to his growing list. I did get a poison gland though, so I can make some poison of my own or maybe even some Turbo later, if Felix ever learns anything about science. But yeah it's all fine and the Boomers get their bomber and everyone's happy and I go to Caesar for some praise and reward but he's just a dick again, all 'waa, my head,' standing up and not even finishing telling me what he wants me to do, then swearing at me and saying he'll kill me when I ask for more information. Felix also gets what is essentially a written warning from the NCR, saying any more pro-Legion activity will leave him branded as a terrorist. I guess shit just got real for Kluge.


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